I had thought about writing a blog for a long time. I got somewhat of a false start last February but became brave enough to earnestly try toward the end of the year. Why tell you this? Well, because I have long debated with myself about what my blog should be like.I was thinking that it should be filled with happy, positive. cheerful, inspiring thoughts and lots of beautiful, awe inspiring photos. You know, a totally rosey world view. Because isn't that the kind of blog people like to read? Happy, shiny perfect worlds? Don't you get lots and lots of readers, friends, hits, whatever that way? Won't you be featured in magazines and on favorite lists everywhere?
Or should it be all artsy and colorful and accomplished and professional? You know, how wonderfully artistic and talented you are. So wonderfully artistic and talented that you could not care less what the world thinks.
And shouldn't I be blogging everyday or at least on some kind of regular schedule? Shouldn't my blog be all slick and full of buttons and gadgets and whatever-you-call its? Have an expertly designed banner?
Have you noticed a common theme in my thinking? Yep, a world full of "shoulds". I keep reminding myself that there are no "shoulds" in blogging or art or...well, a lot of things. Those "shoulds" are some of what has kept me afraid and limited and not being all I could be for most of my life.
Why say all this now? I'm not really sure. Maybe it's time to unburden my soul, to stop being afraid of the world. Or maybe because I have just been extremely pensive today...or I am struggling today and always feel I have to hide that from the world. I don't know.
What I do know is that I am not perfect and my world is not shiny, happy and rosey, filled with colorful, breathtaking moments waiting to be photographed. Sometimes my life sucks. Sometimes my entire world sucks. But not always.
What else do I know? I know I struggle. I struggle every freakin' day with clinical depression, some days more than others. I know there are people in the world who like me, who love me, who believe in me even if I don't.
Where is this all going? It's going to say that I'm trying, taking a small step into the world that I have progressively isolated myself from. This blog is that small step. It is real, it is me and that's all there is.
Thanks for sticking with me. Hopefully the cuteness at the beginning kinda made up for it :)
I think you SHOULD do what your heart tells you to do. :)
ReplyDeleteOkay, here's the truth. Nobody's world is shiny, happy and rosey, filled with colorful, breathtaking moments waiting to be photographed ALL THE TIME. EVERYBODY'S life sucks sometimes. If they say differently, they're just kidding. Life gives us bumps to teach us lessons, make us stronger and appreciate more those days that are shiny, happy and all that stuff more. Life is about learning the lessons, getting back up, making the most of the lemons, and discovering sometimes in very unfortunate ways what is most important in life. One of the best days of my life was spent with you running back to a closed store and banging on the door to get a lollipop. I do like you, love you and believe in you more than you know. I told my daughter (your art sister) the other day, "I think there is a lot of undiscovered talent there." You are an amazing artist (including best color mixer I've ever sat next to in a class) and funnnnnny, not to mention bad ass on a sewing machine. I wish you lived next door. Seriously.
ReplyDeleteKeep up all the good stuff you do, PLEASE!
Love,
Art Mom
Sharyn, Artsy and colorful is good and you do it well but it is only one aspect of your very full life. I think you should share what you want to share. In the process of sharing you will learn more about yourself and your friends who respond. xxoo Susan
ReplyDeleteSharyn,
ReplyDeleteYour friends will enjoy whatever you share because we love you. Your blogging should be whatever you want it to be.
I too thought I should blog more but then I came across another blog that discussed "blogging without obligation"
here is what it says....
After coming across what seemed to be the 4000th or so post on someone’s blog starting with “I’m sorry I haven’t posted in awhile.” I decided it is time to rethink what makes a good blog and the expectations that have come to be part of it. I am thinking that no one should utter those words again . . .and with that thought I give you Blogging Without Obligation.
•Because you shouldn’t have to look at your blog like it is a treadmill.
•Because its okay to just say what you have to say. If that makes for a long post, fine. Short post, fine. Frequent post, fine. Infrequent post, fine.
•Because its okay to not always be enthralled with the sound of your own typing.
•Because sometimes less is more.
•Because only blogging when you feel truly inspired keeps up the integrity of your blog.
•Because they are probably not going to inscribe your stat, link and comment numbers on your tombstone.
•Because for most of us blogging is just a hobby. A way to express yourself and connect with others. You should not have to apologize for lapses in posts. Just take a step back and enjoy life, not everything you do has to be “bloggable”.
•Because if you blog without obligation you will naturally keep your blog around longer, because it won’t be a chore. Plus, just think you will be doing your part to eradicate post pollution. One post at a time. . .
here is the website http://www.tartx.com/blog/?page_id=233
Hugs,
Samantha
Samantha,
ReplyDeleteThank you for taking the time to comment. Your words are EXACTLY what I need to hear. As long as I keep reminding myself that this is for fun not a job and there are no performance reviews,grades,etc. I will be ok. Thank you, thank you and thank you again.